From time to time I wonder what would happen if I – or ANYBODY on these boards – died unexpectedly… nobody I communicate with on the Internet would ever know about it, since none of my friends or family IRL know I frequent certain boards nor have the knowledge of how to post an obituary
That might make an interesting, ironic song
By the way… I see I typed the word "did’ but meant to type ‘didn’t’ 
Freudian slip???
Ta. You talk a load of sh1t sometimes but I still like ya 
Well, thanks but I really can’t take much credit… its really thanks to several unwitting contributors that filled in the gaps for me. 
Likewise. If I died tomorrow… well, you guys would probably never hear about it… probably just wonder WTF happened to Sherz?? Anyway… on a lighter note… errr… argggghh…ugh…cough cough … splutter…croak… 
groan…gasp! …
tick - tick - tick - tick …
A longtime member of my photography forum, Marion Waring, posted a ‘Today I fell off my bike’ thread. Few days later, some stranger logged on with her first post introduction and info that Marion had been taken into hospital next day, and a few days later, posted … “dead”'.
Doug, Ian, I trust you each to have given to a friend or family member, an envelope labelled “In the event of my death”. Offline or online, a relationship is a relationship and here, we are as close to each other as our reflections in the monitor, easily within handshake’s reach. When, one day, this hand shall disappear, let there be someone to say ‘Yes, it is gone’. Then may we sing songs and tell stories to celebrate you and to share solace.
Nicely done Ian, looking forward to hearing it soon. Cheers.
I’ve had a chat with my better half about this very possibility, and have supplied her with my forum details. Also, thanks to things like Skype, we’ve both made contact verbally with a number of members here, so I will hopefully have the chance to say good bye vicariously through her if I should become too infirm to use a keyboard any more.
Its worth telling someone you’re close to to do something like this for you, as Glyn points out so well. Ask yourself how much you value this camaraderie here.
I’ve been toying with doing a video version of that envelope, that would be something cool from beyond the grave!
I am sure Martin’s spirit or energy is aware of what is being done and appreciative. But that’s just my belief system!
Well, I always assumed that i would live forever so it would never actually be an issue.
Seriously though, Glyn does make a good point. I just put my wife on a plane… so it will have to wait till she’s back. Let’s hope I don’t peg off on the meantime…
I see. No thoughtful, supportive comment goes unpunished.
Alrighty then. Face the wolves (and the squirrels) alone if you must.
I’m ready!
That one looks harmless - but this guy looks like he’s ready to do damage:
Incredible idea. Very inspirational.
What kind of bugs me is that although my family and friends are fully aware that I have a home studio and have spent thousands on gear and software, not ONCE have ANY of them ever asked to hear a song I’ve created. Not even my Mom! Not sure what to make of that
A few years back (hell, 20 years ago) I was playing a mix back in one of the cars parked in our showroom and when my uncle heard my singing, he looked at me and formed his hand into a “gun” and put it to his temple and pulled the trigger – which was quite funny, actually
When a family of ducks raise a swan, they are sometimes limited to saying “Hmm … grown up to be an odd duck”
Then again, do any of them do SERIOUS music LISTENING in their own lives.
There’s this tomato salad I do … my party trick. Some guests go ‘Ohhhh!’ and love it. Some go ‘Huh … pretentious f…k’. Some genuinely don’t notice it at all.
SOME memories sit closer than they have any dang right to. I’d find the real sense of ‘20 years ago’ mark … then grab that memory and NAIL IT to that mark, so it can NO LONGER creep into your sense of ‘recent’.
I get angry, Doug, when I hear stories like such as you’ve told me, because for every Man-Of-Iron like you, who retained and continued to develop your strength, there are many who got shaken and tripped up by destructive and, well, Plain RUDE stuff like that. Even the rest of the family’s ‘Zero Interest’ aspect is, in my opinion, strange, and in its own way, IMO, kind of not nice. Thank god you’re the kind of hardy plant who have been able to blossom according to YOUR nature in spite of minimal ‘watering’
Seriously, it’s a good thing to be able to deflect things thrown at us in life, people picking on others, cutting down others for trying. I was desensitized at a very early age, so I can take it as well as dishing it…unlike some I know >
>
But regarding the finger/gun shooting himself in the head-bit…yeah I agree, rude but I have to think he was just kidding around…though ‘kidding’ like this should be followed with an honest opinion…IMO. But there’s just some people who like to tear down others for the sake of being A-HOLES and/or putting themselves up because of their own personal issues. I doubt your uncle has a musical bone in his body, and that was his way of saying expressing subconsciencly that he feels inadaquate… or not [shrugs]
Good post there hardy Steve 
Actually, I went through a similar thing. It took years for people close to get their head around the fact that I’d headed down this musical path afterall I’ve only been doing this. well for 9 years now I guess. It just didn’t gel with them, like it didn’t fit with their idea of who I was… or who they believed me to be - i.e. to most I was the IT guy. They’d talk to me about their computer woes or whatever, and if the conversation ever drifted onto something musical, or I’d make mention of some project I was currently working…they’d look at me with a hint of puzzlement on their face - I imagine they were thinking they must have misheard me… “did he just say something about recording a song?? I think that’s what he said? No…can’t be” - then they’d quickly shake it off and carry on talking about ther PC crashing. My Dad was like that. Anytime there was some mention of music or recording or whatever, there be this slight pause, a blank stare…and then he’d carry on with entirely different topic. Of course when I embarked on the whole singing lark things started to get even weirder with the family ranks!
I still have friends even now that still struggle with the idea that I write, record, perform and sing songs. Mostly friends and family IRL are for the most part disinterested in my endeavours so you’re not alone there Doug.
I recall one time when at a dinner at my bosses house. There was a bunch of guests, we were standing around, glasses of wine in hand, and the conversation eventually drifted onto the topic of music…and in particular the ‘on-hold’ music that plays at the tertiary education instition we work for. My boss proceed to explain how the organisation had adopted about 20-odd tracks of my pop-orchestral stuff that I’ve recorded over the years. The bosses wife walked in on the conversation, missing the part that the music was actually mine and proceeded to complain bitterly about the dreadful ‘funeral’ music they had on the work phone system She said she felt like hanging herself everytime it came on. I could see my boss giving her an urgent and very concerned “look” - that was farking hilarious!
Now here’s a nice piece of irony. I have a friend ( a professional musician/producer) who used to often say “Ian, don’t sing - it’s awful”. Wind the clock forward several years and here he is now co-producing and mixing one of my tunes and mentoring me on singing because he NOW thinks I have a good ‘character’ voice !
I guess the thing was I didn’t let him and several others put me off. I can be a stubborn bugga sometimes so I just carried on with the singing regardless. I know I sounded awful several years ago, and maybe to some I still do! but it’s definitely got better!
…either that or they will end your life prematurely… it’s a gamble
I loved my late uncle dearly and we had a great relationship. So maybe that provides a bit of context to the “Gun-finger-to-head” anecdote. He wasn’t trying to be an asshole. But he WAS in no uncertain terms saying my singning sucked and to be honest on the particular song I was playing back it DID suck – horribly so – something I came to grips with as I got older, less sensitive, and more musically astute. What’s funny is I’ve had a few people tell me I either shouldn’t sing or should get some lessons… and then other people telling me they love my voice. Indeed – I myself am quite ambivalent about my voice – sometimes I cringe when I hear it, other times I think I am quite awesome, actually (if I can put a little “Lord Snarebottom” self-confidence to it, thanks). Explain THAT dichotomy to me!
To me, one of the essential ingredients to being a human being is paying attention to othyer people’s lives. I consider vmyself to be a person who takes note of what other people are thinking, saying, or doing, both IRL people as well as online people. I have a long and wide memory. What bothers me is a good number of my friends, and a few family members aren’t like that. Some of them forget something I’ve told them within minutes of telling them – even major, significant (to me) issues… and some I can easily tell that while I’m speaking bto them, they’re not listening one effing bit… while I recall multitudinous details of conversations and writings THEY have shared. I don’t get it. Is it just normal… or is it a character flaw? Not sure, actually. But then there are those people who pay attention… some of them are on this board… THOSE are the ones I know I can depend on, the true friends.
Sounds EXACTLY like me. My wife is still in the “Ian, don’t sing camp” But here and elsewhere I occasionally get some worthy feedback. For me now though… I’ve largely moved on from caring so much what others think of the noise I make - good or bad… I’m still gonna make it anyway I think subjecting myself to years of regular live humiliation cured that for me!
Some of them forget something I’ve told them within minutes of telling them – even major, significant (to me) issues… and some I can easily tell that while I’m speaking bto them, they’re not listening one effing bit… while I recall multitudinous details of conversations and writings THEY have shared. I don’t get it. Is it just normal… or is it a character flaw?
Ditto on this one too. I have the experience often too. Actually it even goes as far as the other people not even remembering who I am some time later when I paths crossed once again, but meanwhile I know their name, know where we last met and the conversation we had. And what’s interesting on some these occassions there’s not even a VAGUE hint of recognition on their part. Othere’s there’s that slow noddy as they think back…and slowly remember back… and then “oh…yeah I think I remember you now, sorry, what did you say your name was?”
I tell you the ones that really get me though, is those that pretend to be your best mate… right up until the moment where somebody ‘more important’ walks in and suddenly you find yourself hanging in mid-sentence as they just raced off to catch up with them… There’s a guy at the Monday Night open-mic thing I go to that often does that. He’ll come up to me, with a beer in hand, like we’re long lost buddies, usually when other of his ‘preferred’ mates are not around, and chat away quite friendly and jovial etc… as soon as ‘special’, ‘more important/influential/semi-celebrity’ guy walks in… he’s gone and I seemingly cease to exist
Their loss!