song revisited

hello everyone…i posted a song a few weeks back and some of you kindly gave me advice/thoughts…

well , i got a bit of help and the results are here:

it needs a few tiny adjustments in my opinion…

any thoughts will be greatly appreciated…ps NO VOCAL TUNING!

Thanks, mark

Hiya Mark. Listening now. Not sure about that vocal, sounds too clipped and proper if you know what I mean. Needs to flow more. The drums need some work too. The cymbals sound synthetic as opposed to organic. Maybe stick some verb on em and let em ring more. A bit more sustain on the leccy guitars too, they should tail off better than they do.
Cheers
Phil