I’m not sure Shayne (writer) was entirely thrilled with the way I restructured this one. 
I turned his pre-chorus into a chorus, his chorus into a bridge and wrote an additional verse. Personally I thought it worked much better this way. Anyway…
All thoughts, comments and opinions welcome as usual… 
Hi Ian
I think the way you have arranged the song works well. The hook of what would have been the pre chorus certainly is stronger than the original chorus IMVHO.
It’s reasonably early in the morning here and have only listened on my laptop with headphones, so for what it’s worth the mix sounds ok except that the bell ride did intrude a bit too much but on a different system that might be ok.
Cheers
Hi ian,
It’s a good song, but not your (Shayne’s) best.
I’d like to hear more variation in the vocal melody, it follows the bass line too much.
And… I’m not fond about the snare, I think it lacks punch… sorry… 
Maybe just crank up the velocities?
The arrangement works well this way.
The ending was unexpected! 
Cheers,
Wim
Hiya Ian. This one needs more drive, it sounds a bit lethargic though, given the subject matter, that might be the whole idea. I think you need more drive getting to the chorus on this, then let the mix open up more when you get there.
Cheers
Phil
its a nice musical track, I’m not sure about pre choruses or choruses or refrains for that matter, I call them those things cause other people do, lol.
I liked the surprise ending, cool.
during verses I wondered whether the vocal wasn’t mixed into the music enough, maybe too much on top? the umm choruses seemed fine.
Dave - I had a suspicion someone was gonna mention the ride bell! I was noticing it myself, but I thought I might get away with it… clearly not! 
Wim, yes its unfortunate that not every song is a #1 
And yeah…ok, the snare… again.
I agree - some melodic variation is probably needed. I sang this based on Shayne’s ‘sketch’ vocal but never really put any time into developing the melody. That’s my next challenge. Thanks for the prompt!
Phil - I did wonder whether we got the tempo wrong on this one actually? But there may well be things I can still do with the arrangement to help give it a bit of a lift…
Bluebob - yeah, pre-chorus’s, refrians, middle-8’s, bridges… I’ve used them all - for better or worse!
At least the ‘tape-stop’ ending was a hit!
Cheers for the comments. Have now made a few adjustments…
I think the mix sounds very good. Snare sounds ok to me. Bell does stand out. I love that ending.
You probably got to hear the updated mix… with a new snare! (amongst other tweaks) I had also reduced the bell …perhaps still not enough?
Thanks for the listen
Hi Ian
I like this new mix better. That bell sits better. I didn’t find it too loud now.
Probably the weak point of the song, and perhaps the reason the song is not as strong as some of the Stragglers material, is the bridge section but I doubt it’s likely to get re written at this point. 
I think the song is a dud. Sorry. 
You guys have way better tunes than this.
Can’t get more direct than that!